


Divine Chaos

by conceptstage



Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [134]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Traveler Con 3000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:21:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23579077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/conceptstage/pseuds/conceptstage
Summary: Beau and Artagan have a chat about the nature of godhood
Relationships: background Beauregard/Jester Lavorre
Series: Single Chapter Critical Role [134]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1436668
Comments: 2
Kudos: 74





	Divine Chaos

“How did you find her?”

The Traveler would never admit to being startled. He was god, gods didn’t get surprised by sneaky monks. The smirk on her face when he turned to look at her told him that she wasn’t falling for his unperturbed expression. “Ah, Beauregard. Are you enjoying the festivities?”

The monk raised an eyebrow at him but seemed willing to play along for now. “Sure. Jes did a bang up job.” 

The Traveler relaxed back in his chair and waved away one of the fawning admirers who had been at his side all afternoon. “Would you mind terribly giving us some privacy. I have some important business to discuss with my priestess.” The follower said something that The Traveler ignored but bowed and hurried away. Artagan frowned and pulled back the hood just enough so that she could see his eyes. “Now, what was this question of yours that interrupted my basking?”

Beauregard licked her lips and stepped closer, bending down so that their eyes were level with him sitting down. Her eyebrows were turned down seriously and her expression was intense and determined. He’d always liked that about her. She wanted answers to everything and was willing to do almost anything to acquire them. Even staring down a god.

“How did you find her? She told us that you came to her when she was a kid. That’s super fucking creepy on its own, by the way, but that’s not the point right now. She was locked up in that place for her entire childhood. How did you find her back then?”

Artagan hummed thoughtfully and gave Beau an even look, one red eyebrow raised. “How do any gods find their followers. Devotion.”

“But you weren’t a god back then. I’m not even sure that you’re a god now. How could she be devoted to you if no one knew who you were?”

“Not devoted to me, darling.” She sneered at the term of endearment but he continued on without pause. “Devotion to my domain. The other tricksters would have found her eventually if I had not. She radiated chaos so brightly that even a fae could sense it. Even at that young age. It was her devotion to making people smile that drew me to her.”

Beau huffed in annoyance. “So you were just fucking around in Nicodranus and then bam you’re pretending to be a god in a little girl’s bedroom?”

Artagan chuckled and gave her a patronizing smile and made Beau scowl angrily at him. “Oh, dear Beauregard. I was in Tal Dorei when I first sensed our Jester. I was exploring the material plane for the first time, in disguise of course-” He paused to gesture to his cloak. “I had only been on this side for three days at that point. But then I cast my gaze over the sea and it was like looking into the sun. Her chaotic will was nearly blinding. And I am nothing if not a curious creature. I had to know what it was and so I followed it.” He smirked and pulled the hood back up to cast his face in shadow. “And it has only gotten brighter as the years have passed.”

He thought that Beau might leave. She had her answer. But she didn’t seem satisfied and just kept staring at him. Finally, she stood to her full height and looked out over the beach to find Jester giving a paint class to some other followers.

“If she’s so bright… maybe she should be the god.” She turned her gaze back to him and her scorn was smoldering. “Maybe she’s the divine one and you should worship her.” He could tell that she wasn’t seriously suggesting that Jester become a god, she was just trying to unnerve him. He was loath to admit it but… it was kind of working.

“Ah, I see. No, I do not think that Jester would make a very good goddess.”

Beau leaned over him threateningly. “Oh yeah? What the fuck do you have that she doesn’t?”

Artagan grinned. “The desire to be worshiped, my dear. Jester is indeed powerful and she has a very commanding presence but I want everyone in the world to look at me with love and adoration! I am a selfish beast in that way, as all gods are. Jester wants love and adoration from a very small, select group of people.” He gave Beau a once over that made her step back defensively. “Perhaps from one person in particular.”

Beau sneered again and he considered casting a spell to make her face stay that way, at least for a little bit, but he suspected that Jester wouldn’t like it very much. “So, you’re saying that the reason you get to be a god is because you’re a needy bitch?”

Artagan tossed his head back and barked a laugh. “Only the neediest of bitches rise to godhood, darling.” He sighed and looked around for a nearby follower. “You there. Fetch me some wine, if you would?” He grinned when the man scrambled to do so and turned to Beau once more. “Why the frown? You should be happy.”

“Happy? Why the fuck do you say that?”

“Because if Jester were ever to rise to godhood, she would have to leave you. Wouldn’t she? A goddess cannot have a human partner.” He knew that Beauregard and Jester were not lovers but he did enjoy watching the infatuated human girl squirm.

Beau frowned and stepped away. “If Jester ever decided that she wanted what you have, then I would do whatever it took to get her there.”

Artagan grinned in delight. How interesting. “Even if it would mean you’d be without her?”

“Even then.” Then she turned and marched away. Artagan watched her as she left and took the wine when it was brought to him without turning away, smirking as he took a sip.

Mortals were oh so very interesting indeed.


End file.
